January 7, 2013

Moving

I currently live at home with my Dad in the house my He and my Mom built 25 years ago. After my Mom passed away from breast cancer in 2009, I moved back home into my old bedroom and have lived here for the past three and a half years. About six weeks ago, my Dad and I began to prepare to move out of this house. For good. My Dad will be moving to a townhouse in the Annapolis area and I will be moving to an apartment of my own.

For security reasons I am not comfortable showing a photo of the house, but I will paint you a little picture. The house set back in the woods. Leading up to the house is a long, winding driveway, perfect for sledding in the winter. At the top of the driveway sits a large house on a hill. Behind the house is a large deck. Behind that is a pool, perfect for those hot summer months. This house is beautiful, and it has been home for me since I was less than a year old.

This past Saturday, a furniture company from Pennsylvania sent a truck and two young guys down to pick up items we arranged for them to sell. They handed over a check and took with them many things including the bedroom set my sister grew up with and the bedroom set my Mom and Dad used while my sister and I grew up. My sister and three of my cousins then arrived and we began to empty the house out little by little. Six hours and three truckloads later, our furniture had made new homes in our family's houses, as this house gets more and more empty. 

In the midst this, my sister found a junior bridesmaid dress she wore in my cousin's wedding in 1995. My sister was 10 at the time. Did my 25 year old self immediately try it on? Oh, absolutely.

{Please excuse the obnoxious head tilt.}

I then proceeded to dance around the house. And into the driveway.

I could write a love letter to this house. I might one day. It has been the backdrop of our lives for the past twenty five years. I often sit and think about all this house has seen. The family members and friends and pets that have circulated through. And the memories. The memories are endless.

This house was there for us through it all.  Good things, as well as bad things. This house was here throughout my Mother's battle with cancer. Her and my Dad's bedroom, where she recovered from her mastectomy. The dressing area that held her jewelry and makeup and her medicine, wig and hats. The kitchen that she would come down to every morning, dressed for the day even if she had nowhere to go. The deck, where she would sit outside and read. The computer room, where she would research symptoms and medicine and side effects for her friends in METAvivor. The living room, where she slept at night when she was too weak to walk up the stairs. And on days when I called her while she was on disability from work and she would be, "at home relaxing." 

These past six weeks have been surreal. Sad is such a small and tiny word compared to everything I am leaving behind. I am leaving my home. The place where I come from. The place where I grew up. And I am leaving my mother there.

xo-K

14 comments:

  1. Once I read this post, I just had to comment. I too moved back in with my dad after my mother died and have been living in my childhood home with him for the last 4 years. I am trying to relocate and find another job, which is taking longer than I thought, but in a couple of years, my dad is planning to retire and move away to another state too. So then, we will leave behind that home that I've known all my life. I know I'll move before he does, but still, the thought of someone else living in that house that I grew up in and the last house my mother knew of, is almost unbearable. I'm not going through it yet, but I completely understand your sadness about moving. I'm sure I will know it soon.

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    1. Alex, I am so glad you commented. That is a similar situation and you moving in with your Dad I am sure has helped him in so many ways. It has helped me to have the outlook that, yes, this house we have lived in for 25+ years has been wonderful. We are, without a doubt, leaving with so many good memories. However, now is the time to let another family come in and make their own good memories. We have been catching ourselves telling families that have been looking at the house where we put the Christmas tree and how we arrange the outdoor furniture for pool parties. We just can't help it :) Good luck with the job hunt.

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  2. Moving is such a hard thing especially from ones childhood home. Praying for you and your family during the transition!

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  3. the head tilt is only obnoxious if you're not stinkin' adorable... which you are... and this is so cute! love that dress. you are wonderful. thinking of you through all the change. at least we'll all be here for you!

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  4. I love you and your blog. Just found you through LIY and I can't wait to continue reading. Thank you for being honest and real and WOW. Your words are so powerful and I'm sure you're helping so many people going through the same thing.

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  5. Wow, I just came across your blog through Aunie Sauce and I love it. It really is a small world out there ... We're neighbors! I live in Baltimore, but grew up in Idaho. And to top it all off with similarities, I just lost my dad 4 1/2 months ago and reading this post felt all too familiar. I'm excited to follow your blog and hopefully our paths will cross someday!

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    1. I am so sorry to hear about your Dad but I am glad you found my blog and commented. I read through your cute blog and I love it! What did you run in the Baltimore Running Festival? I am running a 10k in June and I need some tips! Send me an email if you'd like! kelsey {at} kelseynicoleblog {dot} com

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  6. I'm so moved by this, I just had to comment. I can't think of a better way to describe it than graceful. i'm so glad to have found your blog.
    LG
    thelauregazette.com

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  7. Kelsey,
    I have been neglecting the blog life and just read this. I had chills from reading your post. Beautifully written and well said. I live downtown as well, hopefully we will run into each other!

    Amanda

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    1. Thank you. I didn't know you live downtown! Let's definitely get together, going to facebook message you my number :)

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